Because I have SO much to be thankful for in my life (and it is one of the words we are working on as a family), I'm going to attempt to write about something I'm thankful for as many days in November as I can. :)
Today I am thankful for cold medicine. Without it I'd feel even worse than I do! I'm thinking my girls (and maybe even Mike) are thankful for my lack of a voice. :)
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Halloween 2011
As per tradition, we celebrated Halloween this year with the local Spook Parade, school parties and trick or treating.
Brooke really didn't dress up this year. She wore her "Thriller" outfit while she worked at the Spook Parade Bash and on Halloween night she put a headband around her head and called herself an Indian/Hippie while she hung out with a group of friends.
Lexy decided she wanted to be a Werewolf this year. Her other choice was a flamingo but she decided she wanted to be scary...and boy was she! With her glasses Lexy has a hard time wearing masks so we decided to paint her face to go with her costume and I think it turned out great. I love that that girl never goes with the "normal" she's always thinking outside of the box!
Brooke really didn't dress up this year. She wore her "Thriller" outfit while she worked at the Spook Parade Bash and on Halloween night she put a headband around her head and called herself an Indian/Hippie while she hung out with a group of friends.
Lexy decided she wanted to be a Werewolf this year. Her other choice was a flamingo but she decided she wanted to be scary...and boy was she! With her glasses Lexy has a hard time wearing masks so we decided to paint her face to go with her costume and I think it turned out great. I love that that girl never goes with the "normal" she's always thinking outside of the box!
Monday, October 31, 2011
It's a Boy...and a Girl....and a Boy!!
We were the chosen family on Friday at the best interest staffing and we were approved by SRS today (five days earlier than we thought!). On Thursday we will take a three hour drive (each way) to sit for four hours and read the file. After that we will wait for a subsidy/APA meeting to be set up by SRS, hopefully that will happen fast too! Our children will move in soon after that meeting :)
I cried with happiness and relief when I got off the phone with our worker and then immediately started freaking out a bit about all that needs to be done in a short amount of time. I know we can do it though so the freak out didn't last long. I called Mike, messaged Brooke (who told her entire seminar class when she got my message) and told Lexy when I went to her fall party at school (she said "this is THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE".)
Our life, family and home are about to change big time and we couldn't be happier! :)
I cried with happiness and relief when I got off the phone with our worker and then immediately started freaking out a bit about all that needs to be done in a short amount of time. I know we can do it though so the freak out didn't last long. I called Mike, messaged Brooke (who told her entire seminar class when she got my message) and told Lexy when I went to her fall party at school (she said "this is THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE".)
Our life, family and home are about to change big time and we couldn't be happier! :)
Informal 2011
The theme for Informal this year was Famous Couples.
On Saturday Brooke spent the day getting ready with a great group of girls before her and Taryn's dates met them at Taryn's house for pictures. Brooke and Sheldon (her good friend) went as Barbie & Ken and Taryn and Andy went as Allie & Noah from The Notebook. Of course Brooke had to drive them all to the dance in her pink car since she was Barbie :)
Brooke came home saying that this was one of the best nights ever!
On Saturday Brooke spent the day getting ready with a great group of girls before her and Taryn's dates met them at Taryn's house for pictures. Brooke and Sheldon (her good friend) went as Barbie & Ken and Taryn and Andy went as Allie & Noah from The Notebook. Of course Brooke had to drive them all to the dance in her pink car since she was Barbie :)
Brooke came home saying that this was one of the best nights ever!
Sunday, October 30, 2011
More questions
Even after two messages left, we did not hear back from our worker on Friday to reassure us that the staffing did indeed happen and that nothing new, crazy or devestating to us happened. Ugh...while our worker continues to tell us that for her "no news is good news", I have never been able to live like that. I need reassurance...perferably on a daily basis that all is still going well.
So Lexy could NOT stop talking about the kids this weekend. Every two seconds she was bringing them up! She is just REALLY excited and believes that they are meant to be a part of our family. We sat down on my bed this evening and spent a couple of hours talking about the kids, how we would do the room (and how we would do it even if the kids don't come), their new names etc. and then Lexy started asking some hard questions. Questions about foster care and adoption and how they work together and why some kids are adopted and some go back to birth parents. She asked questions about why she was adopted instead of going back to her birthmom...and that's a hard truth to tell but we talked about it. She had lots of questions and I answered each one. Lexy had a hard time going to sleep again this evening :(
I knew that us adopting again would bring up some questions, thoughts and emotions for Lexy. I'm just glad that I'm here to answer the questions, listen to her thoughts and reassure her that she has always belonged in our family and that she is SO very loved!
So Lexy could NOT stop talking about the kids this weekend. Every two seconds she was bringing them up! She is just REALLY excited and believes that they are meant to be a part of our family. We sat down on my bed this evening and spent a couple of hours talking about the kids, how we would do the room (and how we would do it even if the kids don't come), their new names etc. and then Lexy started asking some hard questions. Questions about foster care and adoption and how they work together and why some kids are adopted and some go back to birth parents. She asked questions about why she was adopted instead of going back to her birthmom...and that's a hard truth to tell but we talked about it. She had lots of questions and I answered each one. Lexy had a hard time going to sleep again this evening :(
I knew that us adopting again would bring up some questions, thoughts and emotions for Lexy. I'm just glad that I'm here to answer the questions, listen to her thoughts and reassure her that she has always belonged in our family and that she is SO very loved!
Friday, October 28, 2011
Foster Memories Friday - Beth
The next foster placement we took was a little different than the rest. We heard through family that our niece (whom we don't know well) had her daughter placed into foster care. We contacted the child's worker and asked to be considered for placement of Beth. We ended up having to pull the "we know what we're doing and we are relatives" card when the worker resisted moving her to us.
Beth was 10 months old when she moved to us. We tried to settle her into our family but Beth turned out to be one of the hardest kiddos that we fostered. She would scream at the top of her lungs constantly, never willing to settle or be comforted. On top of (or because of ) this...I'm not really sure which...I was never able to form a bond with Beth. I loved her and treated her the same as my girls but I just never got to the point that she was "mine". The case was complicated and we found that us being "family" made it even harder. The birthparents felt that we would give special treatment and not go by the rules for them and we weren't willing to do that which caused tension.
Birthmom had another baby about 6 months into us having Beth. Birthmom got to take that baby home from the hospital with her. It was looking more and more like Beth would be going home (we had started unsupervised visits) when birthmom started failing drug tests again.
After about seven months of Beth being with us we made the decision to have her moved to another foster home. It was a very hard decision for our family but it really was the best for everyone involved.
After Beth left us we heard that the new baby was also taken and placed into the same foster home. Then they were both moved to a grandma before eventually returning home to mom and dad. Beth now has 4 or 5 siblings. Beth is now 5 1/2 years old. I saw her in a store recently and she is beautiful.
Beth was 10 months old when she moved to us. We tried to settle her into our family but Beth turned out to be one of the hardest kiddos that we fostered. She would scream at the top of her lungs constantly, never willing to settle or be comforted. On top of (or because of ) this...I'm not really sure which...I was never able to form a bond with Beth. I loved her and treated her the same as my girls but I just never got to the point that she was "mine". The case was complicated and we found that us being "family" made it even harder. The birthparents felt that we would give special treatment and not go by the rules for them and we weren't willing to do that which caused tension.
Birthmom had another baby about 6 months into us having Beth. Birthmom got to take that baby home from the hospital with her. It was looking more and more like Beth would be going home (we had started unsupervised visits) when birthmom started failing drug tests again.
After about seven months of Beth being with us we made the decision to have her moved to another foster home. It was a very hard decision for our family but it really was the best for everyone involved.
After Beth left us we heard that the new baby was also taken and placed into the same foster home. Then they were both moved to a grandma before eventually returning home to mom and dad. Beth now has 4 or 5 siblings. Beth is now 5 1/2 years old. I saw her in a store recently and she is beautiful.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Chores
We've never really had set chores for the girls but lately I have found that they are getting lazier about cleaning up after themselves. This is especially true for Brooke who really needs to be learning how to keep a home running and clean before she's out on her own and living in filth :).
This is what I came up with...
1. Another area that needs improvement is how we act and speak to one another. Our family will be working on being respectful, cheerful, thankful and helpful towards one another.
2. These are our weekly chores. As a family we have always had our cleaning day on Sunday. Until now the girls have only been responsible for straightening up their rooms and Brooke does her own laundry but now they will be responsible for cleaning one other area of the house.
3. These are the daily chores. The girls pick two per week that they will be responsible for.
4. This is our discipline chart. The girls must move their clothespin down when a discipline issue arises. This starts over each day (except if they get down to grounded).
Each Sunday at dinner we discuss our words and give examples of something done right and something that still needs work for each family member. The girls also pick a new weekly and two new daily chores for the week, they must be different than the week before.
When we get more kiddos, it will be easy to add them to this system. I'm already thinking about adding chores like light helper (turn off all lights in house), line leader (on the way to/from the van), bath helper (hang towels, put dirty laundry in hamper) etc.
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