Answers but not really

I spent the day yesterday shopping (by myself, boo Robin for backing out on me...sickness is not an excuse!) thinking that any moment my phone would ring.  It didn't ring all day so I stopped by the house to check e-mail before heading up to get Lexy.  Our worker had e-mailed (chicken!) that the judge set a hearing date for the end of January to hear the fostermoms side.  It also said that the kids can't be moved until then and we can't visit.  I called our worker and we talked about what this means for us. 

We have no idea how the judge will rule in January.  He could rule against the agency and SRS and let the fostermom adopt or he could uphold agency/SRS decision and the kids would then be placed with us (if we are still interested).  What we have decided is for our sanity we will move forward and look at new profiles.  If there are any kiddos that we are interested in we will have our worker submit our homestudy.   Then in January we will wait to see what the judge's decision is.  If these kids are meant to be ours then it will all work out and if they aren't meant to be ours then maybe our kids will present themselves while we wait!

I returned the car seats today...it was hard...felt like we were giving up.  But we can't have three extra car seats sitting in our car for two months :(  The jammies, stroller and some of the toys still need to be returned.  We've decided to still get the bunk bed set, we promised Lexy she could have one either way.

I've had my moments of "why are we being put through this again?".  Our family has been through a lot of heartache and loss when it comes to kiddos that we have loved.  But we do all feel that this (adopting again) is what we are supposed to be doing so we'll push forward.  We know that we are truly blessed to have one another and if our family is meant to grow again then it will. :)  So for now we will enjoy spending time as our little family and celebrate the holidays to the fullest while we wait!